Pop Junkie Salutes the Longest Snake in History


Wow! They’ve found a snake in Colombia 42 feet long. That’s a full 10 feet longer than the longest python and is about as long as a bus. This feller feeds on crocs and alligators and has a girth so vast that it reaches your hip.

The shame is he’s dead and has been for the last 60 million years or so. Still, let’s toast Titanoboa Cerrejonensis with a look at the snake and his role in pop history, starting with Britney and friend (rather him than me) at the 2001 Music Video Awards.


I imagine that she is hardly the first chanteuse to be snapped with a python draped around her neck, and rather expected to come across a pic of Dana Gillespie in similar pose but to no avail. Ms Gillespie, by the way, noticeable by her unfathomable absence from Pop Junkie’s 50 Most Fanciable Females in Music. And because this is a family site there will be no schoolboy references to the trouser variety, but here’s a nice pic of Robert Plant for the ladies anyway.

Kaa: Trust in Me – Possibly the only song in pop culture sung by a snake but a great song it is too; from the Jungle Book. By the way, the Jungle Book album sits in-between Joy Division and Carole King on my shelf ~ we’ll take a broader look at delicious juxtapositions another day.

Alice Cooper – Rock’s most enthusiastic golfer was once a demon who had come to lay waste to the world’s youth. His ‘Bez’ was a boa constrictor and here the two can be seen in Cooper’s early 70s pomp. By the way, it was his birthday yesterday. Apologies for this oversight when we helped Tim Booth and Florence LaRue to blow out their candles.

The Vipers Skiffle Group – Led by Wally Whyton of Ollie Beak fame (a bit before my time), I have a fondness for skiffle but find Lonnie Donegan a bit more to my taste. However, Beatles fans might enjoy this version of Maggie May.

Python Lee Jackson: Not, as many imagine, an early pseudonym of Rod Stewart, but an Australian band. They came to England in 1968 and were discovered by, quelle surprise, John Peel who recorded In a Broken Dream with Rod guesting with the band.

The final word goes to Mark E Smith, who apparently issued the instruction to The Fall’s Beggars Banquet-era keys man Simon Rogers to “Play it like a fookin’ snake”, which simply ups his genius level another couple of notches in my book.


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