Whatever happened to Nu-Rave?

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If this photo alone isn’t evidence enough at just how shit Nu-Rave was

I was just having a think the other day and although there are still lots of Nathan Barley types kicking around town driving me mad, it has been an awful long time since we heard the term Nu-Rave. I’m glad, as it just proves my point that it was a vacuous waste of time and only good for giving boring trustafarians from Shoreditch and a topic of conversation for down the local new hip and happening pop-up bar. I know this could be seen as yesterday’s chip paper, but it still galls me.

At the past two Glastonburys, I was forced to confront the same old shit but in a different county. Snotty middle class Skins wannabees dancing round with their shit Raybans and glowsticks. Now don’t get me wrong, some of the bands bandying around this term are (or where) good…Klaxons, CSS (now crap), ShitDisco love it, but is it Nu Rave?

So what the hell is Nu Rave anyway? From what I can see, it’s simply indie dance floor fillers and bears sod all relevance to the initial rave movement. Yep, that old chestnut. So, essentially, it’s something other indie bands like Franz Ferdinand and Artic Monkeys et al been doing for a while. I’m being serious here, listen to the Klaxons then stick on some of the old skool rave stuff…Im thinking A Guy Called Gerald and S Express – where the buggering hell is the similarity?

The best bit is check out urban dictionary definition Nu Rave –

Nu Rave is when rich young children ‘rave’ in a licensed venue, listening to average indie pop bands who call themselves Nu Rave to get the rich young kids to buy their records and make them and their record companies/the venues money.

“Hey Ollie are you coming to Koko Nu Rave night tonight, it’ll be jolly good fun. We can buy GLOWSTICKS and wear colourful trousers and act all kerayzeeeeeee, then we can come back to mine and get Jeeves to rustle us up a couple of VODKA AND TONICS…man!”

Nail. Head. Hit.

As for the supposed movement in fashion – glow sticks, well, when you look back at pictures of raves during the late 80s and early 90s, they don’t look cool, do they? We don’t all wanna look like Tracey from Big Brother do we? Glowsticks weren’t cool then and they certainly aren’t cool now. How can anyone who is bolloxed and waving a glowstick look cool?

If you really wanna hear what people were digging back then go buy 100% old Skool and be done with it.

Three cheers for the death of Nu-Rave!

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